Monday, May 26, 2014


After several months of feeling like I was suppose to go and not being able to due to lack of transport or a team or volunteers, I have had my date with God :) I watched a video by Francis Chan where he suggested taking a vacation with God and I was really inspired by that idea. I do not have the time to take a vacation with God, but I have been wanting to go to a mountain and pray for several months and last Saturday I went. For those of you who read my last blog post, you probably could see that I needed to get away for a day!
The biggest thing I was reminded about is that God is faithful. After reading and praying for a bit, I read through my journals that I have written in sporadically for the past 15 years. After seeing how God answered my prayers, both in good ways and in ways I never expected, I was amazed. I am no longer surprised in any way that we live here in Lesotho after I read some of my prayers for my family back in 2009. I begged God to help me never forget what I saw on my mission trip, to break my heart for the things that break His, and to teach my kids what really matters in life. I went so far as to ask Him to burn the images in my mind for the rest of my life. God is faithful and He knew the only way for this to happen was for me to live here and to raise my kids here.
So while I may doubt my abilities at times, God trusts me. He had it planned out for me and He will guide me each step of my journey. I am thankful that I can spend quiet time with Him each day, but there was something extra special about setting the day apart for Him.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Down Days

The last couple of days have been downer kind of days. I am not even sure I could put my finger on the exact cause, but I feel drained and worn out. There have been issues coming up on all sides with staff, volunteers, staff family members, government issues and BG kids. Sometimes I feel like we are drowning in issues, but we have to keep our heads above water so we can still run the day to day operations of Beautiful Gate, not to mention the responsibilities of raising and teaching our kids. It can be overwhelming at times and I am just in one of those phases right now.
There is one situation that I keep coming back to and I am desperate for God to move in this area, but the door has been slammed shut. It involves the health of one of our BG kids (who is not matched right now) and I ask you to pray with me that God will open the door or show us an even better option very soon. I hate the despair that I feel because I do have faith that God can do all things, He just seems to be saying no right now and I need to accept His timing. This is stretching me.
It is days like these where I wonder why God did not pick someone stronger, smarter or more experienced to help run Beautiful Gate. Today, I feel weak and unprepared for the calling. I just ask that in this moment of weakness that you pray for us, our family, our staff and their families and our kids here at Beautiful Gate. Thank you

Saturday, May 17, 2014


Today Terp and I went on a little adventure to celebrate her college graduation and my half birthday since she will not be here to celebrate with me in November. We can justify a lot of things in order to have a day away :) We went shopping, had lunch, visited the Cheetah Experience (where I have yet to actually experience touching a cheetah, bummer), and visited a beautiful garden center. We were able to do all those things today because my friends, Benno and Wendy, have allowed me to babysit their car while they are in Canada and it is so great to have a little freedom.
I have tried to drive a manual but I am not very good at it because remembering to stay on the left and worrying about taxis pulling out at any moment are enough for me, shifting and big hills where I might roll back seem to be too much for my brain. I know it is a bad excuse, but I do not like it at all and prefer an automatic. So now I have a few months of freedom were I can drive a little (don't worry Faths' I do not have a lot of road trips planned). Just getting out of Lesotho once in awhile is a nice way to relax and clear my brain of my never ending to do list here at Beautiful Gate and also give me a chance to take my kids on a few field trips, yeah! :) I know that this is temporary and I am looking forward to having our friends back here at BG again.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Free Verse Prayer

God is always there
He answers our every prayer
When you do not know even where to start,
He knows what is in your breaking heart.

Frustrations may seem to abound,
From every direction, all around.
But God is so much stronger than these,
You need only fall to your knees.

My friends are hurting everywhere,
Some so close to giving in to despair.
I know that You hear their desperate cries,
Feel the pain held in their eyes.

This poem today is for their pain,
Cleanse their wounds with soothing rain.
Lord please answer this, my prayer,
Help them feel that you are there.

In the last few days I have heard of so many friends both here and at home who are going through some very real and very severe struggles and my heart has been burdened to pray for them. Sometimes I have no idea what I can do or say to help ease their burden, but God knows. I tried my hand at a little free verse poetry above because I needed a way to release some of this sadness.

Saturday, May 3, 2014

Healthier Kids at BG

When Bryan and I went to the Netherlands, we met up with several adoptive families. One family had us share with friends of theirs from church and also some of their family. One of her family members pulled me aside at the end of the night and talked to me about the health of the children at Beautiful Gate. She talked with me about the possibility of donating some Herbalife shakes to help with the health of our children.

After returning from furlough, we continued communicating through emails and she sent some Herbalife shakes for us to share with the Beautiful Gate children. For several months before this, doctors were complaining that some of our children were malnourished and were very concerned about their diet. There are many kids who come to Beautiful Gate in different severities of malnourishment and sometimes it takes months to see results in their weight gain. Our nurse was looking into their dietary needs at the same time I was communicating with our friend from the Netherlands .

It has been 3 months since we started using Herbalife shakes with our Beautiful Gate children and the results have been impressive. Each child over the age of 6 months has a little bit of the shake (it is full of vitamins, minerals and some protein) mixed in with their morning cup of milk. In January we had 21 children who were being monitored for being somewhere along the malnourishment spectrum and at the end of April we had 10! Wow, what a difference.

We thank God that He knows the needs of the Beautiful Gate children and that He supplies what we need without us even knowing what to ask. I would never have looked into Herbalife, knowing that our care center could not afford something like that, but God supplied a wonderful woman who had the resources we needed and a heart that reached out to orphans. There is something powerful about watching God work and seeing how He brings together whatever we stand in need of in order to give the best possible care we can to His precious little ones here at Beautiful Gate.