Sad Day

Today made me cry. I don't like days like today because they leave too much to my imagination and make me sad. There is a sibling set that came here back in March. The boy is 3ish and he has a younger sister. I remember his first day here, how sad and slowly he walked down the path to his "new home." He looked so scared and all alone and I remember thinking that I needed to really go out of my way to make him feel welcome. His second day here, I put him on the swing and he seemed a little unsure both about me and the swing. I pushed it real slow and tried to talk to him soothingly and after that I couldn't get him off the swing for weeks :) I would tickle him and chase him around till I could get a huge smile out of him and it brought such joy to my day. Now whenever he sees me, he yells 'Me' Anita and waits for me to come over and tickle him. He has the BEST laugh and smile!

As I walked home today, he was on his motor bike and pushed his bike to me so he could say hi and get his daily tickle. I played with him for a minute and then went inside to check on my kids and that was my last minute I'll have with him. I am glad I kissed him and told him I love him because now he is no longer our child at Beautiful Gate. He and his sister were taken back to their family today with absolutely no notice. Social welfare came and said that their parents "worked out" their issues.

Earlier this year his parents had a big fight (which sounds like it happens often) and the dad decided to go to South Africa and left the kids with their mom. She then decided that she would get even with her husband and abandon their children. Really, you are a grown up who had a fight and you think, "Oh, let me just abandon my children, leave my 3 and 1 year olds alone to feed themselves and change their diapers, etc and that will really show my husband." I know I should not be writing this today because my feelings are too raw, but it just sucks that the kids are being returned to parents who earlier this year had not one thought to their well being when they were angry with each other. What happens when they have their next fight?

I think that the part that made me cry the most was seeing his face as he was ready to walk out to the car. He was not happy to be going home. He looked scared and unsure. He did not smile or say anything. Please pray for him and his sister. Pray that their parents truly have worked out their issues and do not do this again. God loves them so much more than I do, but I am not doing a very good job trusting today so maybe you could pray for me to put my trust in His care. Sorry to be so down but my heart is so sad today.
Anita